What is there left to say about the action in week 2? It was close and competitive as usual. And much to everyones chagrin, Brown stole the show. God knows we all fucking hate when he does that. Let's get to the action.
The records for the week for all teams are as follows:
Satterfield/Lazzo - Oops, looks like these faggots had a bye week.
Dolan/Na-na-na-na-Nathaniel - 0-2 Recording the first OFER of the year. Congrats, you pussies.
Plum/Nate - 1-2 If we have to go first next week, I'm gonna start choppin dicks off.
Brown/Cole - 3-1 Show me someone in the league who doesn't hate this team, I'll show you a bullshitter
DHersch/TNJohnRob - 2-2 Nice effort, but effort doesn't earn you the green. The monetary green anyways
Now to what (only selfish assholes) people really care about, the cash totals for the season, the first number being the weekly total, followed by the totals for the season.
***Let me interrupt by saying that Dan "Formerly Gay Tap" Hersch sank the motherfuck on Brown/Cole to send the title matchup into a sudden death game.
The game ends 8-6 in favor or Hersch/JohnRob, and I know I speak on everyones behalf when I say that I couldn't be happier with this result.
Sinker totals:
Plum- 1 Nice total, asshole - 3 for the season
Nate - 0 Nice showing this week - 4 for the season
Na-na-Nathaniel - 1 Sorry for the early exit - 4 for the season
D-Daddy Dolan - 0 Way to contribute - 3 for the season
Satterfield/Lazzo - Record zero sinks because Lazzy doesn't take care of his shit early enough
DHersch - 3 holy fuck this is surprising - 8 FOR THE YEAR. At this point we're giving this guy the comeback player of the year award.
JohnRob - 3 No one cares - 4 for the year
Brown - 9 Everyone fucking hates you - 17 for the season. It hurts my fingers just to type that.
Cole - 4 Getting carried as usual - 8 for the season
Until next week
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Welcome to the 2008-2009 WU Beer Die League
To those who aren't familiar with the blog, this is where the official records are kept for your viewing pleasure. We have a few new members and teams this year, and after one week it has been as competitive as ever. Lets get to what really matters.
The only teams that are returning from last season are the combos of Brown/Cole and Plum/Nate...so here are the new teams for new season:
-"D-Daddy" Dolan/Nathaniel
-Dan "No longer gay-tap Hersch/ThatNiggaJohnRob
-Satterfield/LazzzMatazzzzz
So with the teams set and ready to battle, I'll briefly address the rules for the new season.
-The loser of the first game of the night is sent directly to the short-die table (which sucks balls) to play the loser of the 2nd game. With our trademark double-elimination format, the loser of the short-die game is immediately out and left to feel like faggot bitches for the rest of the night.
-The rest of the matchups for the night are based on who plays who, with a winner-take-all monetary policy on a weekly basis.
Alright, since everyone in this league *cough cough Brown* are selfish faggots who only worry about how many sinkers they have on a weekly basis, here are the first sinker totals for the new season:
Brown: 8
Cole: 4
Dolan: 3
Nathaniel: 3
Plum:2
Nate:4
Dan:5
JohnRob:1
Lazzzzzz:1
Satterfield:0
For the new year, I'm going to say fuck it to posting the overall records for the season, and just give you cum-guzzling faggots the win totals for the week:
Plum/Nate - 2
DHersch/JohnRob - 1
Satterfield/Lazzzzz - Cero
D-Daddy/Nathaniel - 3
Brown/Cole - 2
Lets get to some match highlights from the first night of action
In game one, the league heavyweights (Brown/Cole, Plum/Nate) again battled to the very end, with Brown/Cole coming out on top 8-6.
DHersch/JohnRob v. D-Daddy/Nathaniel was a match for the ages. Hersch/Rob battle out of a 3-6 hole to tie the game....only to lose in dramatic fashion 10-8. It was an excellent mix of offense and defense, and again the game of die proves to be the most volitile badass game on the planet.
What a shocker: Brown/Cole v. Plum/Nate II (we really need to get some fucking team names) was a battle worthy of being replayed on ESPNClassic. This battle finished with an epic score of 13-11 in favor of the bad guys, which left Plum/Nate hanging their heads in shame. Fuck this game.
"The Battle Royal (with cheese)"
The championship matchup between Brown/Cole D-Daddy/Nathaniel.
*Actually, I'm currently watching this game and its getting more heated than Brown's pants while watching gay porn.
***Update: D-Daddy/Nathaniel take the week with a solid 8-6 beating of Brown/Cole
Alright, it's time to wrap up the week 1 summary, see all of you bastards next week.
The only teams that are returning from last season are the combos of Brown/Cole and Plum/Nate...so here are the new teams for new season:
-"D-Daddy" Dolan/Nathaniel
-Dan "No longer gay-tap Hersch/ThatNiggaJohnRob
-Satterfield/LazzzMatazzzzz
So with the teams set and ready to battle, I'll briefly address the rules for the new season.
-The loser of the first game of the night is sent directly to the short-die table (which sucks balls) to play the loser of the 2nd game. With our trademark double-elimination format, the loser of the short-die game is immediately out and left to feel like faggot bitches for the rest of the night.
-The rest of the matchups for the night are based on who plays who, with a winner-take-all monetary policy on a weekly basis.
Alright, since everyone in this league *cough cough Brown* are selfish faggots who only worry about how many sinkers they have on a weekly basis, here are the first sinker totals for the new season:
Brown: 8
Cole: 4
Dolan: 3
Nathaniel: 3
Plum:2
Nate:4
Dan:5
JohnRob:1
Lazzzzzz:1
Satterfield:0
For the new year, I'm going to say fuck it to posting the overall records for the season, and just give you cum-guzzling faggots the win totals for the week:
Plum/Nate - 2
DHersch/JohnRob - 1
Satterfield/Lazzzzz - Cero
D-Daddy/Nathaniel - 3
Brown/Cole - 2
Lets get to some match highlights from the first night of action
In game one, the league heavyweights (Brown/Cole, Plum/Nate) again battled to the very end, with Brown/Cole coming out on top 8-6.
DHersch/JohnRob v. D-Daddy/Nathaniel was a match for the ages. Hersch/Rob battle out of a 3-6 hole to tie the game....only to lose in dramatic fashion 10-8. It was an excellent mix of offense and defense, and again the game of die proves to be the most volitile badass game on the planet.
What a shocker: Brown/Cole v. Plum/Nate II (we really need to get some fucking team names) was a battle worthy of being replayed on ESPNClassic. This battle finished with an epic score of 13-11 in favor of the bad guys, which left Plum/Nate hanging their heads in shame. Fuck this game.
"The Battle Royal (with cheese)"
The championship matchup between Brown/Cole D-Daddy/Nathaniel.
*Actually, I'm currently watching this game and its getting more heated than Brown's pants while watching gay porn.
***Update: D-Daddy/Nathaniel take the week with a solid 8-6 beating of Brown/Cole
Alright, it's time to wrap up the week 1 summary, see all of you bastards next week.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Week 10
CASH totals:
Brown
Cole
Nate
Plum
Dolan -
Dan - 1
Records -
Brown/Cole - 18-10
Plum/Nate - 14-14
Dolan/Dan - 7-14
Brown
Cole
Nate
Plum
Dolan -
Dan - 1
Records -
Brown/Cole - 18-10
Plum/Nate - 14-14
Dolan/Dan - 7-14
Friday, April 4, 2008
Week 7
Another action-packed week, for two teams at least.
CASH totals for the year:
Brown - 20*** Three asterisks for cheating
Cole - 16* --> Cup-to-cup cash
Nate - 25* Adds 8 to his total this week, by far the best individual performance of the year
Plum - 16* A weak ass one cash in Week 7
Dolan - 8 Continues to be handicapped by Butterfingers Hersch
Dan - 1 One cash? Jesus.
League Standings
Brown/Cole --> 2-2 for the week; 15-10 on the season
Plum/Nate --> 3-1 on the week; 13-12 on the season
Dolan/Dan --> 0-2 on the week (shocker); 7-12 on the season
With Dolan/Dan 8 games out of first, they pretty much need to win every week from here on out. Thank you for your monetary donations gentlemen.
CASH totals for the year:
Brown - 20*** Three asterisks for cheating
Cole - 16* --> Cup-to-cup cash
Nate - 25* Adds 8 to his total this week, by far the best individual performance of the year
Plum - 16* A weak ass one cash in Week 7
Dolan - 8 Continues to be handicapped by Butterfingers Hersch
Dan - 1 One cash? Jesus.
League Standings
Brown/Cole --> 2-2 for the week; 15-10 on the season
Plum/Nate --> 3-1 on the week; 13-12 on the season
Dolan/Dan --> 0-2 on the week (shocker); 7-12 on the season
With Dolan/Dan 8 games out of first, they pretty much need to win every week from here on out. Thank you for your monetary donations gentlemen.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Week I don't know
Brown/Cole, Plum/Nate both went 2 wins 2 losses, and Dolan/Dan went 1-2, cementing their spot as the shittiest team in the league.
CASH totals for the season:
Brown/Barry Bonds - 16*****(Cheater!!!)
Cole - 12
Plum- 15* (cashed out of own cup into Brown's)
Nate- 17*
Dan - 1 (cash a cup for fuck's sake)
Dolan - 8
Brown/Cole owe $10 for this week, and Dolan/Dan owe $5 for this week. As of next week it will be $15/$10, respectively. Don't be bitches about paying. ZACK BROWN IS A PUSSY. And everyone agrees.
CASH totals for the season:
Brown/Barry Bonds - 16*****(Cheater!!!)
Cole - 12
Plum- 15* (cashed out of own cup into Brown's)
Nate- 17*
Dan - 1 (cash a cup for fuck's sake)
Dolan - 8
Brown/Cole owe $10 for this week, and Dolan/Dan owe $5 for this week. As of next week it will be $15/$10, respectively. Don't be bitches about paying. ZACK BROWN IS A PUSSY. And everyone agrees.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Congratulations to Brown
We are issuing a league-wide congratulations to Zack Brown, who is the second man to ever complete the El Agave challenge (Five 32-oz beers in two hours). He had his tab paid for, and naturally, he is ecstatic to be joining the exclusive fraternity of those who have finished the Challenge. CONGRATS BROWN!
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Week 5.....I think?
Week five was filled with ups and downs, so I'll get right to it.
Brown/Cole have taken the middle finger trophy for the first few weeks of the year, but it will no longer be staying at Brown's house.
Coming out of nowhere, Dan "Gay Die Tap" Hersch and Robert Dolan were the big swingers of the week. They took 2/2 games from Plum/Nate, and managed to come away this week with a 3-1 record.
Plum/Nate scored both wins against Brown/Cole, which is a huge bonus to the league.
All in all, here are the records after the 5th week of action:
Brown/Cole: 11-6 on the year, and losing momentum by the moment!
Plum/Nate: 8-9 on the season, inching closer and closer to the #1 spot.
Dan "gay tap" Hersch/Dolan(Wobret Dean): 6-8 on the season and gaining ground.
This was a very surprising week, with Dan/Dolan taking the Middle Finger trophy. Their win not only got them back in the game, but kept the gap between 1st and 2nd relatively close. And everyone still agrees that Zack Brown is a fucking faggot and nothing will change.
Here are the league stats on the season:
Brown - 14*
Cole - 8 (after a very impressive week)
Nate - 11*
Plum - 11
Dan - 1
Dolan - 6
If we don't manage to get a game in before next week, I wish you all an awesome spring break. Except Brown of course. The league is really taking shape now, and we all look forward to badass competition from here on out.
Brown/Cole have taken the middle finger trophy for the first few weeks of the year, but it will no longer be staying at Brown's house.
Coming out of nowhere, Dan "Gay Die Tap" Hersch and Robert Dolan were the big swingers of the week. They took 2/2 games from Plum/Nate, and managed to come away this week with a 3-1 record.
Plum/Nate scored both wins against Brown/Cole, which is a huge bonus to the league.
All in all, here are the records after the 5th week of action:
Brown/Cole: 11-6 on the year, and losing momentum by the moment!
Plum/Nate: 8-9 on the season, inching closer and closer to the #1 spot.
Dan "gay tap" Hersch/Dolan(Wobret Dean): 6-8 on the season and gaining ground.
This was a very surprising week, with Dan/Dolan taking the Middle Finger trophy. Their win not only got them back in the game, but kept the gap between 1st and 2nd relatively close. And everyone still agrees that Zack Brown is a fucking faggot and nothing will change.
Here are the league stats on the season:
Brown - 14*
Cole - 8 (after a very impressive week)
Nate - 11*
Plum - 11
Dan - 1
Dolan - 6
If we don't manage to get a game in before next week, I wish you all an awesome spring break. Except Brown of course. The league is really taking shape now, and we all look forward to badass competition from here on out.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)