Everyone is still here, so I'm gonna keep this brief. I hated the outcome of this week, and all of you assholes are lucky that Nate and I were off.
Here are the win totals for the SEASON:
Brown/Cole: 7-3
Plum/Nate: 4-5
Dolan/Pussy Tap: 3-5
The only team that owes money up to this point is Dan/Dolan. Bring your money to the leauge next week.
But we have to give credit where credit is due, so Cole/Brown deserve credit for playing great die tonight.
Here are the CASH totals for the year.
Brown - 6*
Cole - 4
Nate - 6
Plum - 6
Dolan - 4
Dan - 1
Those are your season statistics, take them as you will. We all look forward to going to battle next week. Faggots.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Attention Smokers
Quit making us wait until the wee-hours of the night to finish these games because you faggots have to smoke. Everyone who doesn't smoke is tired of it. Including the author of this blog.
We hope you all die of early emphysema at age 28.
We hope you all die of early emphysema at age 28.
Week 3 - LIVE BLOG!
This game is Dolan/Dan "Gay table tap" Hersch vs. Brown/Cole
Pt. 1 - Brown/Cole execute homosexual handshake after scoring the first point on Dan
Pt. 2 - Gay Tap sinks one in Brown's cup to tie the game at one, and records his first cash of the night.
*After the cash, Brown rolls a 5.....Dolan/Gay Tap have to drink the whole beer!
Pt. 3 - Brown has a lapse in concentration, Dolan/Dan take the lead 2-1
Pt. 4 -QUICK REPLY! Brown scores on the next throw to pull even at 2
Pt. 5 - Brown spins one nasty off the table, he and Cole take the lead 3-2
Pt. 6 - NICE! Brown and Cole are sucking each other off with the handshake, take the lead 4-2
Pt. 7 - Dolan with a quick reply! Cashes on Cole's cup, brings the score to 4-3
Pt. 8 - (Brown GUARANTEES that Cole sinks it here, (doubtful)) To steal a line from Ben Folds Five - "She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly" Cole bricks it off the table. Dolan scores a quick point! 4-4
Pt. 9 - Dolan/Dan - pull ahead 5-4
Pt. 10 - Dolan/Dan - 6-4, and by Jesus, this league is getting out of control
Pt. 11 - Brown scores to go 5-6, and I'm being labeled the drunk dumbass for not scoring correctly
Pt. 12 - Holy fuck! Brown fades away to tie the score at 6! Amazing!
Pt. 13 - Brown knocks one off the cup, takes the lead 7-6
Pt. 14 - Wow - Brown front-faces one off Dan's cup, takes the game 8-6! Hard-fought. I'm now going to work.
Pt. 1 - Brown/Cole execute homosexual handshake after scoring the first point on Dan
Pt. 2 - Gay Tap sinks one in Brown's cup to tie the game at one, and records his first cash of the night.
*After the cash, Brown rolls a 5.....Dolan/Gay Tap have to drink the whole beer!
Pt. 3 - Brown has a lapse in concentration, Dolan/Dan take the lead 2-1
Pt. 4 -QUICK REPLY! Brown scores on the next throw to pull even at 2
Pt. 5 - Brown spins one nasty off the table, he and Cole take the lead 3-2
Pt. 6 - NICE! Brown and Cole are sucking each other off with the handshake, take the lead 4-2
Pt. 7 - Dolan with a quick reply! Cashes on Cole's cup, brings the score to 4-3
Pt. 8 - (Brown GUARANTEES that Cole sinks it here, (doubtful)) To steal a line from Ben Folds Five - "She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly" Cole bricks it off the table. Dolan scores a quick point! 4-4
Pt. 9 - Dolan/Dan - pull ahead 5-4
Pt. 10 - Dolan/Dan - 6-4, and by Jesus, this league is getting out of control
Pt. 11 - Brown scores to go 5-6, and I'm being labeled the drunk dumbass for not scoring correctly
Pt. 12 - Holy fuck! Brown fades away to tie the score at 6! Amazing!
Pt. 13 - Brown knocks one off the cup, takes the lead 7-6
Pt. 14 - Wow - Brown front-faces one off Dan's cup, takes the game 8-6! Hard-fought. I'm now going to work.
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Season Stats
Just to clarify....a "cash" is when a player throws a die and manages to drill it directly into the opponent's cup. These are the number of "cashes" on the season.
Brown - 2*
Cole - 3
Dolan - 4
Dan - 0
Nate -4
Plum - 4
The league has agreed to negate stats from Week 1. The league also agrees that Zack Brown is a pussy.
The fact that Brown is trying to legitimize his Week 1 stats is merely a sign of desperation. Good luck to everyone in Week 3.
And the most important element: the overall records for each team. (Are as follows)
Brown/Cole - 4-2
Plum/Nate - 3-3
Dolan/Dan - 2-3
ALL TEAMS OWE MONEY FOR WEEK 2....NO EXCEPTIONS.
* - As one can see, Brown has his pink panties in a bunch about how many cashes he's got. So from now on, he's going to get the Barry Bonds asterisk.
Brown - 2*
Cole - 3
Dolan - 4
Dan - 0
Nate -4
Plum - 4
The league has agreed to negate stats from Week 1. The league also agrees that Zack Brown is a pussy.
The fact that Brown is trying to legitimize his Week 1 stats is merely a sign of desperation. Good luck to everyone in Week 3.
And the most important element: the overall records for each team. (Are as follows)
Brown/Cole - 4-2
Plum/Nate - 3-3
Dolan/Dan - 2-3
ALL TEAMS OWE MONEY FOR WEEK 2....NO EXCEPTIONS.
* - As one can see, Brown has his pink panties in a bunch about how many cashes he's got. So from now on, he's going to get the Barry Bonds asterisk.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Week 2
Well boys, it was a hard-fought night with a (predictably) different outcome than Week 1.
Here's what I'll try to do from now on: try to the best of my wasted ability to recap every game of the night.
Game 1: Brown/Cole vs. Plum/Nate - By far the best game of the short season. Plum makes what could arguably the best catch of the season. Brown tosses the die off of Nate's cup, ricocets off of both of Plum's knees, off both of his hands and falls into his grasp. Nate tosses a textbook off-the-edge throw which is caught by Brown. This without a doubt changest the momentum. Plum/Nate leads 5-3, and Brown/Cole come back with a vengence to take the game 9-7. W/O a doubt the best game of the season, with both teams acknowledging such. Hard-fought to the end.
Game 2: Dolan/Dan vs. Brown/Cole - Man, this shit dragged out forever (51 minutes to be exact). The game seemed to be tied at 2-2, until Dan/Dolan made a serious move to take the game in a landslide.
Game 3: Dolan/Dan vs. Plum/Nate - This game was without a doubt back-and-forth. Dan/Dolan led 5-3 in this game, but Plum/Nate went on a ridiculous run to finish the game 7-5.
I'm wasted so I'll keep this short. Plum/Nate went to town while all three teams were tied at 1-1.
Boys, this was a great week. We can only hope that every week is as competitive as this, and we look forward to our meeting next week.
Here's what I'll try to do from now on: try to the best of my wasted ability to recap every game of the night.
Game 1: Brown/Cole vs. Plum/Nate - By far the best game of the short season. Plum makes what could arguably the best catch of the season. Brown tosses the die off of Nate's cup, ricocets off of both of Plum's knees, off both of his hands and falls into his grasp. Nate tosses a textbook off-the-edge throw which is caught by Brown. This without a doubt changest the momentum. Plum/Nate leads 5-3, and Brown/Cole come back with a vengence to take the game 9-7. W/O a doubt the best game of the season, with both teams acknowledging such. Hard-fought to the end.
Game 2: Dolan/Dan vs. Brown/Cole - Man, this shit dragged out forever (51 minutes to be exact). The game seemed to be tied at 2-2, until Dan/Dolan made a serious move to take the game in a landslide.
Game 3: Dolan/Dan vs. Plum/Nate - This game was without a doubt back-and-forth. Dan/Dolan led 5-3 in this game, but Plum/Nate went on a ridiculous run to finish the game 7-5.
I'm wasted so I'll keep this short. Plum/Nate went to town while all three teams were tied at 1-1.
Boys, this was a great week. We can only hope that every week is as competitive as this, and we look forward to our meeting next week.
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